Feeling Less

So how do I explain this? An absence; a lack of something. I feel very little...

Why bother, it's all been said before; I'm depressed.

I guess I've known it for a long while, but I just hate using that word "depressed". Maybe because it has a stigma, it screams that I don't work hard, I don't care for myself or others, or I'm not active or whatever. It's just not true. I'm consistently recognized for my good work, I'm in better shape than I've ever been in my life, I'm in a band and socialize reasonably well (well, not that good, but it's good for me), I just feel pointless and bored.

I'm 23 in a few days, what can I even say? I have no plans for my birthday. No party or friends over or cake or even a good dinner. Why should I? I won't feel a damn thing. I played video games with a girl the other day and while she got excited about the game and hanging out, I FELT NOTHING! Just a little awkward like the one guy who's not crying at a B rate drama.

Like I said before, this is a classic symptom of depression, but I don't know what to do about it. Guess I'll try to "keep on existing in the now" as Eyedea would say. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9-eKhCukW8

Later yall